So, I had intended to post today and apologize for my most recent blog posts and the direction they were taking. You guys know I’m looking for a job, and that seems to take over my every waking thought here lately. I sat down the other night and typed this out so that I could post it at my next internet access opportunity. Here is what I wanted to say :
I feel like I should apologize to you guys … for my actions.
I get on my blog time and time again talking about how wonderful God is and how much He does and provides for my family. I try to encourage others in the process, showing them that GOD IS AWESOME and He’s got your back and He’s always perfect in His will and timing. Then, I get on my blog and I make myself look like an idiot begging for prayers that I get a job or that we are OK financially, or whatever.
I’m not practicing what I “preach” and it’s taken me a while to realize that. I am sorry for that.
I sincerely appreciate everyone that encourages me and prays for me. I’d by lying if I said I wasn’t a little nervous and scared about our job situation, but – with the gentle reminders from others – I’ve been able to SEE that this is God’s plan and I need to just BE STILL and know that HE is God and that He’s going to take care of us. I need to stop crying and whining around about everything we don’t have at this moment.
I’m basically annoying myself.
So, again – I’m sorry for my blog posts lately. I think I might even delete them. I will try to practice my own advice from now on and look to Him for everything we need.
Thanks for always being so awesome, guys!
I’m so happy that I was able to take a step back – look at my actions and my thoughts – and tone them down a little bit. I’m going to try my best to NEVER let myself get carried away like that again. It’s at the top of my list of things I’m working on.
A close 2nd on that list of things I’m working on, is finding a suitable business casual wardrobe because I was hired for a job this past Friday. (insert hallelujah chorus here) The job I was hired for is a temporary position at Mississippi State.
Answer to prayer # 1 : Allow me to get my foot in the door SOMEWHERE at Mississippi State.
The department I’m working for has a permanent position opening up in the near future that I feel like would be a great fit for me. My CURRENT prayer is that I’m able to do this temporary job to the best of my ability and I’m able to slide into a permanent position with Mississippi State.
Right now, God is giving me exactly what I have prayed for.. exactly what I’ve asked for over the last several months. Even though I whined and cried around about it, He gave me what I wanted. It makes me feel even MORE guilty and ashamed for how I have acted! I am so beyond thankful and humbled that He would do that for me. I am SO thankful He is giving me the opportunity to do something I REALLY wanted to do at a place I REALLY wanted to do it.
Over the past few days I’ve kept telling myself to just BE STILL. Chill out. I know God is God and He is capable of anything and everything. He has a plan for me and He knows exactly what He’s doing. His timing is perfect. I just need to be still and allow His blessings to cover me.
And that’s what I plan to do.